British model and actress Kelly Brook is dishing out advice on maintaining her figure and keeping relationships interesting.

Brook is engaged to actor Billy Zane and says you should fight with your man even if you agree with him. Its good to pretend to fight. She says fighting and fantastic lighting keep it interesting.

She disclosed the secret to keeping her figure. The 27-year-old says she keeps her figure by having ‘tons of sex’. A couple of years ago her natural 32E breasts were voted Britain’s favorites. I imagine that her 32E-24-35 figure might have something to do with her having ‘tons of sex’ too. Its kinda like the chicken and egg thing. Does the sex keep her figure so sexy or does her sexy figure keep her having tons of sex? You know what I mean?

I just really don’t think a 27-year old has any authority to give advice on keeping a figure. I know there are exceptions, but really, 27-year-olds aren’t exactly fighting middle-aged thickening yet!

She’s also dissing women who marry footballers for money. She says she got where she got all on her own. I don’t guess her twin 32Es come into the equation of her success at all. She also disapproves of celebrity women who go clubbing and come stumbling out of the club ‘with their knickers over their heads’.

While she’s giving advice she’s the woman who made a name for herself posing nude and using her 32Es to their full advantage. She is also the woman who lost a Harry Winston diamond bracelet almost a year ago and still hasn’t paid for it or returned the bracelet.

And another thing. What is with this red, gold and silver outfit? I hate it. I know these pics are accompanying an interview in Company magazine promoting her dancing on Strictly Come Dancing. Still, she looks like a disco ball in all these pics.

click on images to enlarge

source

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How to Tell When a Relationship is Over
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

hat-tip Luminiferous Aether

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David Beckham has been estranged from his father, Ted, since the elder Beckham divorced Ted’s mother in 2002. Their estrangement got more complicated when Ted Beckham was less than supportive of Victoria during the dramatic events surrounding allegations of David having an affair. At that time, it is said that Ted advised David to make himself happy whether or not that meant staying with Victoria. Victoria did not take that advice well at all and has not welcomed Ted into her home since. Ted also wrote a book about his famous son in 2005 which further strained the relationship.

A family member said: “David has been saying ‘It’s not because he’s a big drinker - it’s because he works all the hours God sends. His dream has been to have a small apartment in Spain. Why didn’t I just buy him one for Christ’s sake? It could have saved him getting ill. The problem is he’s so bloody independent.’”

The family member continued: “Since he found out, David has been rambling and in a state of shock. He really feels he has really let his father down.

“He feels he’s not been there for his father in years. Ted has been lonely, that’s the problem. He depends on Lynne (David’s sister) and her children for comfort.

“With David living even further away, he feels he’s made it much worse for his father.

click on images to enlarge

And as Ted drifted in and out of consciousness at the London Chest Hospital, in Bethnal Green, Beckham, 32, appeared to be overcome.

He broke down and visibly wept whilst cradling his father’s hands in his own.

The pair have not been close since Ted and David’s mother Sandra went through a bitter divorce in 2002.

Friends and family described David as being “in a state of shock” about the heart attack because he thought his father had been in such good health.

One family member told the Daily Mail last night how David has blamed himself for the sudden deterioration in his father’s health.

David with his parents Sandra and Ted in 1998. The couple divorced in 2002

Victoria at Japan’s New Tokyo International Airport, is traveling to London to be with her husband David

The Daily Mail

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Or, How To Avoid Trapped Arm Whilst Cuddling In Bed

VideoJug: How To Avoid Trapped Arm Whilst Cuddling In Bed

Learning these cuddling techniques can bring magic back into your relationship. I hope you found it useful, after all, we are here to help!

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OMG, Hazel, you won’t believe what my HMM* did last night! Do you remember a post I wrote a few weeks ago about how my HMM just LOVES to pee outside? We have plenty of toilets, but he prefers to pee off the side of the porch or ANYWHERE outside.

Yesterday we decided to take a walk. It was almost dusk, and we were walking in an area out in the country. We walked past a very dusty area, and my HMM decided he needed to pee. I continued walking a few steps and paused to wait for him. He took a L-O-N-G time. Finally the tinkling noise of the pee hitting the dust stopped.

“Hey! Come here and see what I did!” he said proudly. “I peed ‘I love you’ in the dirt!”

I looked, and yes, he did. I didn’t know whether to go “EWWWWW!” or acknowledge the obvious sincerity in his gesture. Men have given me many gifts over the years, and men have done some unusual things to please me. However, as I mentioned to my HMM, no man has EVER peed his love for me.

Should I be flattered or insulted? He was quite proud of himself.

(*high maintenance man)

Adeline, that’s hilarious. You have had a spew alert on that! I think he truly loves you to do such a thing!

Trackposted to Outside the Beltway, Perri Nelson’s Website, 123beta, Jeanette’s Celebrity Corner, Big Dog’s Weblog, Shadowscope, Stuck On Stupid, Leaning Straight Up, The Bullwinkle Blog, Phastidio.net, Right Celebrity, Allie Is Wired, Woman Honor Thyself, The Crazy Rants of Samantha Burns, The World According to Carl, and Pirate’s Cove, thanks to Linkfest Haven Deluxe.

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Okay, Hazel, I found the answer. It’s an online article from Marie Claire about how to seduce someone. We can try these out on our respective HMM (high maintenance men). Here are the first four of seven suggestions:

How to Seduce Anyone
By Bai Ling

1. Do the slow reveal.

Seduction is an art. American men will ask you right away: “What do you do for a living? Are you married? Do you have a boyfriend?” They’re very blunt. That’s too easy. That’s boring. They should take the time to see who you are. And you should slowly reveal who you really are.

2. Flaunt your assets.

If you love a part of your body, show it off. I like to wear short skirts, and I like to show my stomach — that works for me. Wear a favorite color. Wear a perfume that heightens your sexual senses. And don’t wear too much jewelry; it’s distracting. Most important, don’t get caught up wondering, Oh, will he like this on me? He’s not the driver, you are! If you’re confident, he’ll feel it.

3. Don’t hide your apprehension.

Having anxiety during a date isn’t a bad thing. It shows your vulnerability. Intelligent guys like that. If you’re nervous, there’s a vibe there that can be kind of lovely, so don’t try to cover it up. Don’t think so much. That’s when you start to get lost.

4. Pay attention to your upper body.

On most dates, you’re sitting down with a man, so seduce him with your upper body, your breasts, your shoulders. Also, smile! When you smile naturally, it makes you more attractive to others.

Click here if you’d like to read the other suggestions.

Open trackback to: Jeanette’s Celebrity Blog, Right Celebrity

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Hazel, at the home I share with my adorable HMM, we have three perfectly good toilets. They’re clean, fully stocked with TP, hand soap, a sink and all the amenities. However, my HMM loves to stand on the edge of the patio and see how far he can pee. For that matter, he likes to stand anywhere outside and pees. However, porches and patios are particularly attractive to him as a launching site.

“Hey, watch this!” he’ll call to me, and I will stand there and ooh and aah over his incredible peeing skills. Apparently, the higher and further the pee goes, the more manly he considers himself.

I swear one of these days he’s going to throw out his back from thrusting so hard while he’s peeing in an attempt to get his pee to land further out than before.

So what is it with men wanting to pee outside?

That’s hilarious! I don’t know what it is, but as far as I know they all do it. I’m sure that’s where the saying ‘pissing contest’ came from! lol hazel

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Hi Hazel, I wrote a few days ago about how someone should handle being suddenly single. What I described in that post was my first step in getting on with my life after the end of my marriage. For the most part, I loved my years as a single adult. I had more fun and enjoyed life as never before. I learned that I have talents and abilities that I wasn’t able to enjoy in my marriage.

When I was newly divorced and feeling as though I’d be alone forever, I never could have imagined enjoying my singleness, though. I had to make myself get out of my comfort zone and start attending some activities that were interesting to me.

For me, it was important to know other singles. I was reeling from the divorce and feeling adrift and alone. When I was first divorced, I didn’t know anyone else who was divorced. Well, I knew some divorced people, but I wasn’t friends with them. Up until that time, my whole world had revolved around my marriage and the community of married couples that I knew.

So after filling up my calendar with activites (as suggested in “What To Do When You Find Yourself Suddenly Single,” I started looking for a group that I felt would be a good fit for me. For me, it was a divorce group at a neighborhood center. A lot of larger churches also offer “Divorce Care” or “Divorce Adjustment” classes aimed at helping newly divorced people handle the emotions and adjustments associated with divorce.

One thing I had always wanted to do was learn to dance, but my ex-husband wouldn’t attend classes with me. It looked like so much fun, but I couldn’t do anything other than freestyle dancing by myself. So I looked for some dance classes, and I signed up for them. You can pay big bucks and go to the nationally franchised studios, or you can look for smaller classes offered at community centers and churches. I opted for a church that offered group dance lessons because I didn’t have much money, and I wanted to meet people who weren’t just out looking for dating prospects. That turned out to be a good option for me.

To this day, two of my best friends in the world are two women I met at the divorce group I attended years ago when I was newly divorced. We also attended the group dance lessons together. All three of us have since formed strong relationships with men that we met while participating in the various singles activities.

For awhile, I also belonged to a singles golf group. I loved that. I joined a book discussion group, too, and became a leader in a community singles group - planning weekly activities for a group of 30 - 50 singles. It was fun, and I made a lot of friends.

One downer for all the singles groups: It seems that there are ALWAYS more women in the group than men. I guess that’s just a fact of life.

Being involved in singles groups will also teach you quickly how to handle over-eager men - men who are anxious to find someone quickly to take over their cooking and cleaning and bedroom needs. Steer clear. Fortunately, there are also a lot of men who have learned from past failures and are eager to try a more egalitarian relationship.

So follow these steps: (1) Get that calendar and follow these directions; and then (2) Follow through and get involved in the group that is most interesting to you. You have nothing to lose - and a lot to gain

Good luck!

Previous articles in the series on adjusting to single life.

• What to do When you Find Yourself Suddenly Single

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I was just reading a news story about the number of sex partners people have. It seems that men have more sex partners than women - a lifetime average of 7 - while women have an average of 4. I don’t know, Hazel, but I’ve always heard that seven is supposed to be a lucky number. Do you think that has anything to do with why men have that many partners?

New survey tells how much sex we’re having
29 percent of men, 9 percent of women say they’ve had 15 or more partners
NEW YORK
It’s a question that often prompts a boastful answer or a bashful one: How many sex partners have you had?

Now the federal government says it has authoritative statistics, documenting that men are far more likely to play the field than women.

A new nationwide survey, using high-tech methods to solicit candid answers on sexual activity and illegal drug use, finds that 29 percent of American men report having 15 or more female sexual partners in a lifetime, while only 9 percent of women report having sex with 15 or more men.

The median number of lifetime female sexual partners for men was seven; the median number of male partners for women was four.

The survey, released Friday, is based on data collected from 1999 to 2002 for the National Center for Health Statistics, a branch of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

In previous federal surveys on these topics, participants were asked questions in face-to-face interviews. The CDC believes that caused underreporting of behaviors which might be viewed negatively, although the survey did not provide any comparative results from earlier reports.

This time, data was gathered from 6,237 adults, aged 20 to 59, in what are called computer-assisted self-interviews — a method designed to provide complete privacy and produce more honest answers.

“This is the first time we’ve used this technique,” said Dr. Kathryn Porter, who served as medical officer for the survey. “The participants have a headset on, they hear questions, they touch the screen with responses. There’s no one else in the room and they can take as long as they want.”

Porter said the findings would provide grist for further studies, notably on the prevalence and patterns of sexually transmitted diseases.

Though the survey results were presented by the CDC without subjective comment, they will likely provide ammunition to various parties in the ongoing national debate over sex education, cohabitation and access to birth control.

If men have so many more sex partners than women, how do the numbers work out that way? Guess I’m not too good at math, but it would seem that it would work out fairly evenly - unless lots of men are having sex with men…and maybe that’s the answer?

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Hazel, after looking over the emails we’ve been getting, I figured it was time to answer some of them. So I randomly selected one. The question and my answer and advice are below. You’re welcome to chime in with your opinions about it.

Hi Adeline and Hazel, Yesterday I had lunch with some co-workers at a restaurant near our office. There was a new waiter there, and he was drop-dead gorgeous. I mean, you could see the muscles through his shirt, and his smile blew me away. He was hot. I can’t get him off my mind, and I feel guilty because I love my husband. Am I being unfaithful by thinking about the hot waiter so much?

What do you think? Preoccupied in Pennsylvania

Well PP… No that doesn’t sound very nice. Let me start over. Well, Preoccupied, I think it’s simple. Just because you WANT a candy bar doesn’t mean you’re going to eat one. Just because you see a new pair of to-die-for shoes doesn’t mean you’re going to throw out your old ones. Just because you think about killing the jerk who cut you off in traffic doesn’t mean you’re going to. Just because . . . well, you get the point.

Looking at and thinking about something you like is not a bad thing. Admire Mr. Hot Waiter from afar, and when you and hubby are doing the horizontal tango, you can fantasize about him. Your husband will thank you. Well, he’ll thank you as long as you don’t tell him it wasn’t exactly him who got you so hot and bothered.

Now that I think about it, I wouldn’t want my husband fantasizing about another woman when we’re having sex. Maybe Hazel will know exactly what you should do. Hazel?

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