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When I think of all the time I’ve spent trying to keep my ass from looking like that!!! All the hours on the elliptical machine, treadmill and exercise bike … just to keep my ass from spreading. Do you have any idea how frustrating it is when I look at these pictures and realize I could have just let my ass spread out, put on a tight pair of jeans or a dress to accentuate the curves, made a sex tape and uploaded it to the internet and made a few million off of a huge ass? I mean …. damn.
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