American Idol Judges

The American Idol judges have reached out to the Pop Princess/Trainwreck and have offered to collectively manage her career. They say her career is not over, but she needs some proper management and they are just the people to do it.

Britney Spears Britney Spears

We have decided we can bring Britney back,” Cowell tells Fox News, stressing, “We are serious. We plan to buy her some underpants, get her bigger shorts to perform in, and get her away from her stupid friends.” (Quite the ambitious trifecta, if you ask me.) “MTV ratings are up,” notes Cowell, “and all we’re hearing is ‘Britney, Britney, Britney!’ She can turn it around.”

Adds Randy, “We’d love to take care of you, Spears! We will make you a superstar again!”

Britney’s reaction to the overture… after the break.

Gimme More

Britney photos Maple Juice

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