Have you ever noticed that in every relationship there is a spender and a saver? It’s kind of like having a night person and a morning person in each relationship. I think there is a law that requires it.

In my relationship I’m the saver and my husband is the spender. Oh, and he’s the morning person and I’m the night person. Fortunately, we both make decent incomes so until recently I haven’t paid that much attention to what he spent. I paid the bills and he pretty much had free reign on his spending. What that translates into is that we have not been financially wise.

Most people spend what they make. If you make $20,000 per year you spend $20,000 per year. If you make $200,000 per year, you spend $200,000 per year. That’s all well and good until something unexpected happens. If you and your spouse each earn $10,000 per year and one of you loses your job, it’s devastating. If you and your spouse each earn $100,000 and one of you loses your job, it’s just as devastating.

In the same way, you and your best friend might both spend $50,000 per year. That might work for your friend, but not for you. If your friend makes $60,000 per year and you make $45,000 per year then your friend is living within her means and you are not. In fact, under that scenario you are incurring more debt each year.

The point is, living within your means is all relative.

It doesn’t matter how much or how little you make. If you don’t live within your means you are digging yourself into more debt and any unplanned for financial set-back can be a serious problem.

There are a few things that can help you get on track financially by living within your means.

• Sit down and take an honest look at your finances and spending habits
• Make realistic financial goals. For instance, where would you like to see yourself financially in six months? You might need to break it down to smaller periods of time, maybe one month.
• Decide how much you can spend based on where you are now financially and based on your goals.
• Decide that you are willing to not let others dictate how you spend money. You don’t have to keep up with anyone else. In the long run you are the one that has to live with your financial decisions.
• Make a list of actions you can take to curtail your spending.
• Start making the changes necessary to live within your means.

There are a few things you can do to help you limit your spending. Decide how much you can spend before you go shopping and take that amount of cash and no credit cards with you. This will prevent you from impulse spending. If you tend to spend more with a certain friend then find something else you can do with that friend rather than shopping.

I’ll write more about this later.